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Am looking for dating man
believe that a good relationship consist of honesty, trust and open communication. I want to fall in love with my best friend and someone that knows what I am thinking or feeling without words having to be spoken.
Like most of my clients (and probably, like you), she’s quite a catch. In fact, if I were to distill my sentiments about what you should be looking for in a partner, I would probably say this. Yet if you’re in the 90th percentile in looks, intelligence, and income, you likely think that the key to happiness is finding a man who is in the 95th percentile. And most of all, because his charisma is probably indicative of a whole bunch of other qualities – his desire to flirt with other women, his bossiness, his stubbornness, his refusal to settle down or compromise…
Blonde, great smile, looks amazing for her age, creative and fulfilling career…and still, no guy. Yes, Laura’s dated that charismatic guy a dozen times – always with the same result.
It’s not that she regretted the opportunities that passed her by in the past – it’s that she made a strong determination in 2010 that she didn’t want to be alone any more. She knows herself well – driven by success, fiery, opinionated. And even three-year-olds realize that this is an impossible (and thankless) task. Remember – I’m not trying to pair you up with bland, boring, and lame men.
She knows what kind of men she’s been drawn to – more successful, more fiery, more opinionated. The most attractive men seem to be the worst partners. More pointedly, have you ever realized these men aren’t a good fit and STILL gone for the next attractive man who seemed more successful, more fiery, and more opinionated than you? You need to try a DIFFERENT method to get a DIFFERENT result. Right, it’s probably time to alter your image of Mr. Just know that if Laura brings 60% of the charisma, her partner should probably bring 40% of the charisma.
You may THINK that the only person you can be happily married to is the man who is six feet tall, Ivy-League educated, makes $300,000/yr, and has the same religion and political leanings, but that’s just a restriction that you have imposed. If Laura’s bringing in 60% of the income, her partner should probably bring in 40% of the income, and so on.
I don’t blame you – my ideal woman looks a lot like that, too! By having a balanced partnership, you can lean on each other and clearly define your roles without all the ego and conflict.
But you’ve created a definition of your perfect man in your head – and when each new man doesn’t fit into that box – you get rid of him. My wife handles customer service because I have a worse temper. My wife handles money because I’m better with words.
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Because the trickiest thing about finding a perfect partner is that your perfect partner is not the perfect PERSON. Because a charismatic man wants to be the center of attention. Because he’s likely to compete with Laura for the last word. Laura may be DRAWN to men who are more charismatic than she is, but they’re not good fits for her. My client Laura finally “got” this during our last call. She’s the one who dominates conversation and is the center of attention when she’s at a party.I handle paying for vacations; she’s the one who plans them. Relationships aren’t about two people who like skiing or two people who enjoy live music.Relationship are about how a couple can negotiate and compromise in every aspect of life.So when you date the man who is just like you but “better”, you’ll likely end up with a man with the same strengths…and the same weaknesses. Are those who are attracted to me naturally my complement? 95% of the time I took the initiative to ask guys out.If I married someone with my weaknesses, my wife would be difficult, opinionated, short-tempered. I was trying to change this but it appears that if I don’t ask, nothing happens. Unfortunately, my friends, who are trying to get me out of singledom, and I realized that it is my very own personality to be pro active. And there are a couple of guys who indicate that they are approachable than approaching and most of the time have a positive response when I ask them out. The reason that we work is because she’s my complement: patient, happy, easygoing. If it seems like a challenging shift to wean yourself off of men who are just like you, all you have to do is look at the results. You’re reading my blog for smart, strong, successful single women. Wir verwenden Cookies, um Inhalte zu personalisieren, Werbeanzeigen maßzuschneidern und zu messen sowie die Sicherheit unserer Nutzer zu erhöhen.