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I’m 23 and have just ended a six month relationship. I’ve just been promoted at work to a post where there’s a lot of travel.
All of this has made me realise I do want a physical relationship but with no strings. In order to help you think about what possibilities are open to you I’ve listed a number of questions for you to reflect on.
Not all will appeal, but hopefully this will give you a better idea about what you might try.
You may want to explore same sex relationships either in fantasy or real life.
‘No strings’ is usually taken only to be about physical pleasure, but if you wanted there is no reason why such encounters can’t also be about romance and companionship.
You will have your own limits when it comes to how connected you want to be. The following resources might help you define your ideal relationship while clearly conveying your wishes to others.
They focus on non-monogamies which may not suit you but still contain useful advice about negotiating boundaries and clear communication The Ethical Slut Opening Up Rewriting the Rules Exhibitionism for the shy You may want to visit chat forums, blogs, websites and groups with like-minded people.
Some who are into BDSM/kink, swinging etc organize general meet ups (sometimes called munches) where you can find out more before you try anything. Looking out for yourself One of the ways no-strings relationships are presented to women be they bi, straight or lesbian is they are inherently dangerous.
Stern warnings are given that a one night stand could easily end in an STI or being harmed by your partner.
Some might argue it’s right to highlight such possibilities, others that they’re used to put people off having alternative sexual experiences.
When you meet someone be very clear what you would like to do, where your boundaries are and what is not ok.
The resources listed above can help with this and reduce misunderstandings over what you want or who you will be intimate with.
Not every encounter has to end in sex and all involved can change their mind at any time.